THE PRINCESS BRIDE

By: William Goldman

Plot: The book describes itself best: "Fencing. Fighting. Torture. Poison. True love. Hate. Revenge. Giants. Hunters. Bad men. Good men. Beautifulest ladies. Snakes. Spiders. Beasts of all natures and descriptions. Pain. Death. Brave men. Coward men. Strongest men. Chases. Escapes. Lies. Truths. Passion. Miracles."

Thoughts: I was in seventh grade when I first got this book for Christmas. I had it in my English class to start reading it and Daniel Smith (one of the smartest kids in our grade) saw that I had it. I remember he picked it up, looked at it, and then proceeded to tell me that I had an abridged copy. And I believed him! For YEARS! YEARS! Honestly for many, many years I thought that there was some longer version out there with a bunch of pages about women packing. Honestly I was kinda bummed about it because who wants to read the abridged version of a book? I don't even remember how long ago it was that I read something about the book and realized I'd been tricked! I never even figured it out myself! Well played Daniel Smith, well played.

Rereading the book now, 15+ years later, and actually getting the book, I loved it. I enjoyed it way more now, than when I read it in seventh grade. The movie is obviously amazing and a classic, but the book is just as amazing. My favorite parts were probably the ones that weren't included in the movie. I loved Fezzik and Indigo's backstories and childhoods. I also loved them actually traveling through the Zoo of Death, one of the main things not in the movie, and there aren't many. And of course all of Goldman's interjections. I liked all the weird stuff he put in and I'm still mad about the reunion scene. Can I still send a postcard to that address? I also liked reading about his round son and how he waddled around.

Favorite Quotes: "Life isn't fair, it's just fairer than death, that's all."

"Life is pain. Anyone who says otherwise is selling something."

Rating: 5/5 It's almost like he's making fun of all the classic love stories, while writing one at the same time.

DRACULA

By: Braum Stroker

Plot: If you don't already know the plot to Dracula then... I don't know what to tell you. But basically five strong man-brains and one woman-brain fight to destroy the king of the un-dead. The whole story is told through their diaries.

My Thoughts: I was kind of expecting this book to go like Frankenstien, where once you're finally introduce to the monster you realize the origin story is nothing like what the monster is made out to be today. But it wasn't. The Dracula that I've always heard about seemed to be exactly the same as the Dracula in the book. I also wasn't expecting it to be as creepy as it was but I was pleasantly surprised.

The first part of the book is probably my favorite. Jonathan actually living with, and then later being held captive by, Count Dracula in his mansion was the best. It's the most that Dracula is actually in the book, he is talked about constantly but there are only three maybe four scenes that he's actually there. It also tickles me the image of Dracula driving Jonathan to his house and then having to run around into his mansion and opening the door for him like he'd been there the whole time. How did no one ask Jonathon how he escaped after reading his diary?? That was never explained, even though I kept waiting for it.

The next part of the book, with Lucy, I really enjoyed too, and then it kind of slowed down after that. They just were reading and plotting and running errands and then plotting some more. Especially because they only once once or twice came face to face with him in all this time. They just had to toss crackers into his 'boxes' and call it good. It was weird the pedestal they put Miss Mina on. And then the fact that they didn't IMMEDIATELY realize what was happening to her even though they had just been through it with Lucy, was dumb. It definitely picked up at the end and I kind of liked how it did come down to the very end of the book.

Favorite Quotes: "I told her how anxious I was about Jonathan, and then she tried to comfort me. Well; she succeeded somewhat, for, though sympathy can't alter facts, it can help to make them more bearable."

"You are a clever man, friend John; you reason well, and your wit is bold; but you are too prejudiced. You do not let your eyes see nor your ears hear, and that which is outside your daily life is not of account to you. Do you not think that there are things which you cannot understand, and yet which are; that some people see things that others cannot? But there are things old and new which must not be contemplate by men's eyes, because they know--or think they know--some things which other men have told them. Ah, it is the fault of our science that it wants to explain all; and if it explain not, then it says there is nothing to explain."

"I could not resist the temptation of mystifying him a bit--I suppose it is some of the taste of the original apple that remains still in our mouths--so I handed him the shorthand diary."

Rating: 4/5 I dug it. 

JOURNEY TO THE CENTRE OF THE EARTH

By: Jules Verne

Plot: A professor discovers a manuscript that has instructions on how to get the the center of the Earth by a man who claims to have made the journey before. The story is narrated by his nephew who he takes with him.

My Thoughts: At first I was really liking this book. I enjoyed the whole 'secret message' scenario, even with the wimpy narrator Axel. And then there came fifty (or so) pages of oh so boring travel. It's almost halfway through the book before they even start their decent into the Earth! It was so hard to get through and by now Axel has really started to bug me. He whines the whole time about how they're going to die and he wants to turn back. What boy isn't excited to go on an adventure like this? I wish his beloved Grauben would have come along and then maybe he wouldn't have been so whinny. Or, honestly I wish she would have come instead of him.

Once they finally start their real journey the story picks up, but by then I don't really care anymore. And honestly who doesn't bring water? Water! That's the dumbest thing I've ever heard of. And another thing, (while I'm on a roll here) they find a person (!) a seemingly HUMAN person (!!) and then they just leave!!! Like, nah, that's not interesting at all. Come on Jules, what are you thinking? That would have been so much cooler to read about than Axel getting lost in a tunnel.

This book is barely over two hundred pages and it took me nearly two weeks to get through. It would have been so much better without all that pointless travel in the beginning and gotten more into the whole center of the Earth thing. And then *spoiler alert* they don't even make it to the center!! What?! What was the point then? Oddly enough though, I would still pick up another Jules Vern book. I haven't given up on him yet.

Favorite Quote: "Ah, those women and young girls--female hearts--always incomprehensible. You are either the most timid or the bravest of beings. Reason has nothing to do with you."

Rating: 2/5 It was ok.

NORTHANGER ABBEY

By: Jane Austen

Plot: A young women, Catherine, is invited to Bath with a Mr. and Mrs. Allen where she meets many new people and falls in love. Obvs.

Thoughts: The main character Catherine was definitely not my favorite Austen heroine. She was so naive and too oblivious to a lot of the stuff that was going on. Especially about different character's motives. Somethings seemed glaringly obvious and they just went over her head. On the plus side, I guess she did seem to see the best in everyone. It definitely makes sense that her character was so young and that Jane was young herself when she wrote it.

At first I thought it was a little weird how Jane would speak to the reader in the book, probably because I wasn't expecting it. But then I ended up kind of liking it. I also love the way that her character's talk about each other, especially their looks. They're so blatantly honest. Were they really like that back then? I find it very refreshing. Sometimes rude.

Her main love story was not even the best relationship of the novel. Which was a little disappointing when reading a romance. I thought her relationship with his sister, Eleanor, was more interesting than the one with him. I still liked him, but I felt like his character was hardly developed at all and that there wasn't even a whole lot of interaction between them. Or at least not as much as I would like. Heck, I thought Catherine and Mrs. Allen had a cuter relationship. In comparison to the other Austen novels that I've read, the romance in this one was lacking.

Favorite Quotes: "The person, be it gentlemen or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid."

"To look almost pretty is an acquisition of higher delight to a girl who has always been plain looking the first fifteen years of her life than a beauty from her cradle can ever receive."

My Rating: 3.5/5 Definitely not my favorite Austen story, but still enjoyable.

REBECCA

By: Daphne DuMaurier

On the Back: "'Last night I dreamt I went to Manderley again...' With these words, the reader is ushered into an isolated gray stone mansion on the windswept cornish coast, as the second Mrs. Maxim de Winter recalls the chilling events that transpired when she began her new life as the young bride of a husband she barely knew. For in every corner of every room in the immense, foreboding house were phantoms of a time dead but not forgotten--a past devotedly perserved by the sinister housekeeper, Mrs. Danvers: a suite immaculate and untouched, clothing laid out and ready to be worn, but not by any of the great house's current occupants.  With an eerie presentiment of evil tightening her heart, the second Mrs. de Winter walks in the shadow of her mysterious predecessor, determined to uncover the darkest secrets and shattering truths about Maxim's first wife--the late and hauntingly beautiful Rebecca."

My Thoughts: I think my main problem with this book was the main character. She was awful! She acts like she's 16 instead of 21. Actually I've read books with 14 year olds more mature than she is. I mean who runs away when people come to their house? Or breaks something and then hides it?? In their own house! She just acts like a child. She is a huge pushover, so insecure, tries way too hard to please everyone, has no backbone... I don't know if the intent was to make the reader feel bad for her or what, but I just found her annoying.

[More ranting.] She cares way too much about what everyone thinks of her. She over analyzes everything! Maxim has a strange look in his eye and suddenly she's made up this whole ridiculous senario in her head about what he could possibly be thinking about. And it's usually bad. She just makes everything out to be so much worse than it actually is.

Never in a million years would I call this a romance! Their relationship was too weird! I honestly don't understand why they would ever love each other. I mean the thing that finally brought them together was just bizarre! I was not impressed. The only really saving grace of this novel is the plot. It is really well written and there definitely are some twists and turns in the plot with some suspense. The last hundred pages were my favorite. So the story was definitely good, but the immaturity of the main character (who doesn't even have a name btw) just ruined it for me.

Favorite Quotes: "I am glad it cannot happen twice, the fever of first love. For it is a fever, and a burden, too, whatever the poets may say."

"Happiness is not a possession to be prized, it is a quality of thought, a state of mind."

Overall Rating: 2/5